Friday, March 11, 2011

RE-UPDATED (AGAIN): Tina - Wedding Coordinator / Douchebaguette

My friend's college roommate, an officer in the United States Marine Corps, was scheduled to be married on March 19th.  She is marrying another USMC officer.  The wedding has had to be postponed until next year due to the groom's deployment being unexpectedly moved up.  They just found out last week and immediately started calling all the vendors.  Everyone was very understanding, with the exception of Paradise Cove on Lake Grapevine, where the ceremony and reception were going to be held.  

Please see the following email exchange.


It feels like the speed bumps never stop coming; B and I are going to have to postpone the wedding. His battalion, which was set to deploy in mid April, will now be deploying early. All leave after March 14th has been cancelled; his multiple requests to be able to have two days off for the wedding were denied. That all being said, we will be having another reception next year. We would still like to use the venue. We don't have a date yet (we found all of this information out this morning), however, as soon as we do, we will let you know and see if you are available. We are thinking next year, probably in May (so that it'll be warmer). I apologize for the extremely short notice.

After reading over the contract, I understand that events are not subject to rescheduling. My question is, because we'd like to have the reception at Paradise Cove, is there a way that would not have to forfeit the entire contract price? The money that we get back from the wedding will go towards rescheduling my flights so that I can stay in California with him until he deploys (since I'm stationed in Virginia) and also help pay for his father's flight from Ohio to California, so that he can see his father before he deploys since he won't get to see him at the wedding. It is understandable if not, since we kept you from obtaining other clients that day. Once again, sorry for the incredible short notice and any inconvenience this has caused.


I have worked with soldiers that got last minute notice that they were getting deployed and did not have a chance to have their weddings before deployment and ended up coming home with missing limbs, extreme burns and even blindness and it makes me sick to think that you had full knowledge of his deployment before you booked your wedding here and yet you chose to book it so close to the date of deployment when you were fully aware that he could have been deployed early or been called away for training prior to deployment.

You said you only heard of the early deployment on March 4th but if that is the case then why did you send me an email on March 4th at 11:23am stating “ his multiple requests to be able to have two days off for the wedding were denied. “ ? You and I both know he could not have sent in multiple requests and gotten multiple denials the same morning he found out.

You were blessed with 8 months notice which is something so many military couples would have given anything for and yet YOU chose to push the limit and book the wedding just before his deployment. And now you are trying to take advantage of vendors and friends by making them feel sorry for you and acting as if this is something completely unexpected. You gambled by scheduling your wedding to close to his deployment date so it is very dishonest of you to request for your vendors to be the ones to take the loss of revenue and it is even more bold to ask to move your wedding date from a less appealing outdoor wedding month of March to the most appealing outdoor wedding month of May because as you stated in your email “(so that it'll be warmer)”.

I know you are fully aware of the cancellation policy as I think it was no coincidence of the date you cancelled so the cancellation policy is in full effect!

Your actions reflect poorly on yourself, both personally and professionally, and on the United States Marine Corps. I can only wonder what your commander would think of your actions.


I realize that on some level this woman is doing her job.  However, the toxicity of her reply is reprehensible.  Please pass this on, and below I have included the contact information for this wonderful writer.

Tina Nealy - Wedding Coordinator / Giant 'see you next Tuesday'
Phone(817) 329-1668
Fax: (817) 488-1405

UPDATE: I guess this made its way around enough that word got back to Tina.  She emailed ME! (See below). For starters, I am REALLY upset that she did not take on the new job title I clearly spent a lot of time thinking up for her.... But, I really would like to know ALL the facts. All I know is the undoctored emails that C posted and C's character.  The fact the she is now claiming she is a liar is just as offensive.  Even if C claimed she was a unicorn who craps gold and controls the weather, the response is STILL unjustified.

I emailed her to see if she would share the facts, and if necessary but unlikely, I will post a retraction blog if C, in fact, turns out to be a lying unicorn.

Tina Nealy - Wedding Coordinator / Douchebaguette is not an accurate post.
I am sorry you do not have all of the facts in this situation or the emails leading up to my response. When the truth and the facts are made public everyone including yourself will see I am not in the wrong in this situation. C was not honest with me and is not being honest with anyone as she is spreading false rumors around to gain sympathy.
I am taking legal action in this matter so the truth can be told.
I know that you are innocent in this situation as you do not have all the facts so I do not blame you for posting this.

UPDATE 2.0 - Tina and I have exchanged a few emails. If you read, you'll see that she hasn't stated she didn't send the toxic email.  I don't care a flick that C is getting a partial refund.  That's all good and well and damned well nice of Tina to do because she was not obligated to do so from what it sounds like.  Again, my biggest qualm is with the SPIRIT of her email to C.  Read below:

From: John 
To: Paradise Cove at Lake Grapevine

Sent: Friday, March 11, 2011 11:30 AM 

Subject: Re: Falso post


All I know is the character of my friend and the emails I saw.  Any and all other facts I would be really pleased to see and HAPPY to post to my blog as well as a retraction.

Thank you, John

From: Paradise Cove at Lake Grapevine
To: John
Sent: Fri, March 11, 2011 11:49:25 AM 

Subject: RE: Falso post

Thank you for responding!
I fully support the military and the part in my email about missing limbs, burns and blindness is because I have donated weddings from the rings to the honeymoon to soldiers that got last minute papers and had to deploy before having their weddings and came back badly injured. Amazing men that are now are missing arms, legs, eye site etc… so that is why this dishonest situation has truly broken my heart because I know of so many honest soldiers that truly need the support of myself and others and unfortunately this situation at hand does not deserve that support.

When C booked her wedding in September via email she already knew he was being deployed in April and did not inform me of that prior to booking. I have proof of that because she emailed me a couple of days ago saying “As far as deploying in April, that had been scheduled since August of last year” I have each and every email correspondence as proof.
It is also not mentioned anywhere that she is in fact getting a partial refund per our cancellation policy.

I am taking legal action as I have all documentation to prove I have done nothing wrong.

Thank you for taking time to review this. The hateful and threatening emails coming in have been overwhelming as I know where my true heart is in regards to the military as my own nephew just got last minute papers and is shipping out soon for his 3rd time.

Sincere gratitude and blessings,

From: John
To: Paradise Cove at Lake Grapevine
Subject: RE: Falso post

Tina, I think it is great that you do fully support the military and I respect the hell out of your nephew for his service.  My intent was never for you to receive threats from people who may or may not have been directed to my blog.

I must say, the writing and sending of negative, unprofessional, tactless, and senseless emails is something a coward does from behind his or her computer.  

So, my sincerest apologies for the overwhelming "hateful and threatening emails" that have made their way to your inbox.

Best, John

UPDATE: Other than cancelling the Gilmore Girls, The CW as a network has done very little to piss me off. Until today... Actually, I completely forgot they were a network until today.

Apparently, upon the insistence of many involved and a few related key parties, it picked up the story. However, instead of talking about the actual incident and the toxic email that lit the fuse on this debacle that the Douchebaguette will 'never recover' from, they talk about how the bride and her friends started an online smear campaign. Really?

Again, there was never an issue with the actual actions of Tina, it was the spirit and unnecessary douchebaggery that went along with her response she sent to C.

Read the full article here on The CW's website. OR email the person who did the story! Her name is Dawn Tongish and can be reached at

PS - The video shows my BLOG and picture (however they failed to mention the URL)!


Jenny, the Bloggess said...

Wow. What a horrifically rude response. I've recommended them before for parties and fundraisers. I certainly won't be doing that again.

Maxie said...

WOW. why in the world wouldn't she just say something like, "No, i'm sorry, our policy states that we cannot refund or transfer your deposit"

What she said was rude and incredibly disrespectful.

Lacey Bean said...

That's awful. Yes, I understand that sometimes, even though circumstances come up, the venue can't do anything to change protocol. But to write an email like that to a client? No matter what the reason, is disgusting. Shame on that events manager. She brings a bad name to the industry, and I for one would email the head of the venue to let them know.

John said...

Thanks, y'all. I am still in shock about this. I can't wait to see if she responds with 'facts.' The 'facts' I have are the emails that clearly speak for themselves.

At least she, herself, said I was innocent. Does that release me from any legal action?!

Anonymous said...

That's the same dumb response she's leaving on all of the facebook comments. She's an idiot.

E Angelina Johnson said...

your response was hilarious! "I must say, the writing and sending of negative, unprofessional, tactless, and senseless emails is something a coward does from behind his or her computer. "

Christy said...

This reminds me of the Cook's Source debacle (

Good luck! No one should be spoken to like that from a business owner. It's just bad business.

Daniel said...

OMG what a mess...Just looking at the emails she sent to you even sounds like the same person that sent those emails to 'C. Her catty use of words really makes her sound like an overweight "Cee You Next Tuesday" and a "Bird In The China Heat" ...*chuckles*

Ruth said...

Wow. Above and beyond everything else, to point out to a bride the possibility that between now & the end of their deployment it's possible that she & her fiance will be wounded (or maimed) in the line of duty is an incredibly callous way to start out an e-mail. Accusing her of lying, other bitchiness was bad enough, but that's outright cruel.

Anonymous said...

Dude, your blog comes up 5th in the list when the words "Tina Nealy" are searched for on google. Texags (Aggie forum) and Paradise's fb page are all blowing up about this.

John said...

That is insane! I am overwhelmed by this response. I am glad. I may not fully defeat the Internets, but I hope I defeated this woman.

She could have saved herself a TON of grief and unwanted emails if she simply said: "I'm sorry for circumstances. No. A contract is a contact."

Actually, she didn't even have to apologize. A simple, one word response, "No" would have worked too.

Unfortunately, she took the low road, and I am joining her on that road in the hopes that this goes somewhat viral and no one ever books with her EVER again.

Amber said...

I have been Keeping up with this today from a message board I belong to and while I 100% don't agree with her reply email I'm having a hard time feeling sorry for the bride. It sounds to me like Tina was fed up, this OBVIOUSLY was not the only correspondence, there are missing emails that C conveniently omitted when sending this out to everyone she knew. I have a lot of respect for our Military, but Just because you're military doesn't give you the right to act however the hell you want and still get sympathy when shit doesn't go your way. You are held to a higher standard and if you make yourself to be a liar and try to take advantage of people, that is disrespectful to our military, and it's shameful!

Anonymous said...

I was in the military and did 3 deployments. Every military member knows you do not schedule major events 2 months before and three months after a deployment. You knew about your deployment how long in advance? As an officer you should know better. Some of the words used may have been harsh, but her point was spot on. Your in the military and you hear about that stuff happening all the time so why set yourself up for it? Stop using the military as an excuse to try and make people feel sorry for you.

John said...

Words can't express how much I appreciate the feedback. To the last commenter, I do not know of those sorts of planning details and thank you for your service in the military.

I don't think C was trying to use the military as a sympathy vote, she was demonstrating as to why she had to cancel one of the most important days of her life. Could it have been a dead family member? A medical emergency? A natural disaster? Did a dog eat her homework?

An excuse is an excuse. This one was out of her control and she was simply conveying that sentiment to Tina.

Did C completely tear Tina a new one and write her a heinous email saying her policies were ridiculous? No. She was complete tactful and gracious in her request.

Tina as a business owner in the service industry (or any industry whatsoever), had no write to lash out as she did. I don't care if C was hounding her (which she was not), a simple 'no' was all she needed to say. And she had a binding legal document on her side.

In no email or feedback on other venues has Tina denied the fact that she did write the email that conveyed such dark and unnecessary sentiments.

Anonymous said...

That is one of the most unprofessional emails I have ever read. I don't care if C was a horrible client. I don't care if she lied, threatened (I thought her email was very polite!) and cussed throughout her notice to cancel, the event rep had zero class. You NEVER speak to a client that way!

If Tina just stated that while she was sorry about the situation, she could not veer from policy and provide a refund, done deal.

A smart businesswoman would have said that C had to forfeit a portion of the deposit, but that the remainder would be held toward the upcoming wedding date. Then she would not be out any money, and she would have appeared the hero.

A reaming of a client is never right. Especially with the ability to provide copies on the internet. This is one big bad PR nightmare.

Sorry, Tina. There is nothing that you can produce that would justify your unprofessional behavior. It was just wrong. And you undoubtedly cost your business. Was it worth it?

Shayla said...

Hey I just posted this on my blog!!

I linked to your post!!!


I found out about the situation thru a friend who's older sister is friends with the bride to be- Amazing how things like this spread like wildfire!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I've "shared" too. Ranks right up there with "Blah, blah, blah--the e-mail heard round the world":

Hope this goes viral and becomes a teaching tool an cautionary tale in business classes across the country. Such a terrific example of what NOT to do and "How to look like an asshat."

Rhonda said...

Thanks for posting this! I am a wedding photographer and I like knowing who "not " to conduct business with as well as who is professional. Never never will I work with them and will tell every prospective bride this story. My brother and nephew are in the military and I would be heartbroke if this happened to them. So unprofessional....

salwa said...

John, I completely agree with your comment on March 11. There is NO call for a vendor to send a client an email like that. She should vent to her friends, vent to her family, vent to private boards, but when it comes to client communications, she needs to be professional. If she's experienced any backlash from this incident, hopefully that will be the lesson she takes away!

Kinyama said...

Eww... That woman has no idea how to run a business. Her letter is totally uncalled for. If she was sticking to her guns about the cancellation policy, she should have said "I'm sorry, cancellation policy in effect" and left it at that.

Eww, eww, ewww... rude, rude rude. I will never send business her way and I hope she learns better business communication in the future to avoid this kind of backlash

Jeane said...

Wow...that is really all I can say. I can't believe she said that about soldiers being maimed. She is very sad. I am so glad you got this out as marriage should be a happy event especially for soldiers who will soon have to part!

Anonymous said...

Maybe you'll want to put a facebook button to your website. I just bookmarked the url, but I must do it by hand. Simply my 2 cents.

John said...

I think I did now. Who knows? It is totes confusing.

Anonymous said...

Having been on the other end of Tina's horrid emails, and her unprofessionalism that almost cost us our wedding this does not surprise me at all (sad, isnt it?) She is a woman all about the money hiding under a "God-loving" pretense. I was horrified in her blatent ability to play victim in this during the WB33 news story. Trust me, I KNOW that brides complain....and her unprofessionalism runs deep.

John said...

(Most recent) Anonymous commenter, I would give my left arm and like 11 pug puppies for those emails.

Thanks and sorry about your experience with T. Baguette.