Friday, January 21, 2011

defining the d.

I’ve been watching all of Sex And The City (for the first time) and have unanimously decided with myself that I am a ‘Carrie.’  I have a successful writing career, date older, and have a very high opinion of myself and my opinions.  So, right now, I’m channeling my inner Sarah Jessica.  I’m even typing this on a black MacBook, wearing high heels, and got a perm.  (Only one of those is true…)

Anyway, what is dating?  So many people have varying definitions of the word or they attach a qualifier to it thus redefining it further... So, I have no idea what exactly it is… 

In a world where you can be dating, exclusively dating, dating around, messing around, fooling around, seeing someone, and so on, where do we crossover from being a complete lovefool (aka – dumb slut) and in a committed relationship where cheating is prohibited and battery is frowned upon?

A lot of people say they are ‘dating’ someone after a couple dinners, trips to the bar, and/or random horizontal encounters.  Others can be seeing someone for months and never use the D word.  The true lovefool has a one night stand and/or great first date and think they are 'Notebook-I’m-A-Bird' in love.  When you get two lovefools together and the air is right, they go from dinner on Tuesday to a full-blown facebook official relationship by the weekend.

I REALLY don't understand people who are dating multiple people in one week.  First of all, whose social calendar is that wide open and how can you have the energy to go on multiple dates with different suitors in one week!?  Initial dates are the worst.  They are like interviewing for a job that may never call you back, have a criminal record, and/or be a Plushie!

Personally, I classify dating as being exclusive.  Also, you are only ‘dating’ someone when you stop going on ‘dates.’  Every dinner or meeting isn’t a song and dance of clever remarks and coy flirting.  You are just there together and know that you will be again in the near future.

That’s my two cents on dating, and considering my little first-hand experience in successful dating, it’s probably more like 2 rupees.

PS - I've seen the SATC movies, but never the series.  I'm knee deep in Season 4 and hate Aiden all over again.  Seriously, why did he take her back?  She cheated... A LOT!  But, I hope I really am a Carrie and can find someone stupid enough to take me back after major screw ups.  Usually, when it comes to prospective daters I ask you be a non-ugly, non-cheating guy who has enough respect to avoid the face when hitting me...

I may need to raise my standards.  Also, no earrings or Ed Hardy.  Seriously, that stuff makes my eyes want to vomit.

But, for the record, I can confidently say I am 99.99% sure if one were to date John Corbett, he would NEVER hit you.


Gina said...

I once went on 5 dates in one weekend. Friday night dinner, Saturday morning hiking (big surprise- no second date from that guy) a Saturday lunch/movie, Saturday night dancing, and Sunday evening concert.

John said...

@Gina - that is VERY Samantha of you!