blame tv

A lot of y'all have been asking why I haven't blogged in a while. By 'a lot' I mean, like two of my close friends.

The culprit is TV. In case you are unlike me and have hobbies that actually get you out of your house, you might be unaware that the new fall seasons of TV have returned.

Just like the first day of school, I wore my best outfit, was prepared  to greet (and judge) the newbies, and developed a near anxiety attack over seeing my old friends after a long summer.

In the realm of old friends, can someone please go all Travis on Glee and just put it down. I was a huge advocate for the homo-explosion that was the first teaser trailer of this show two years ago. I was a Gleek. I may or may not have cried to multiple episodes back when the show had heart. Now, it is a repetition of the same jokes and little to zero development of the most two dimensional, stereotypical characters on television. Seriously, Dot on The Animaniacs, had more depth.

For a show whose third season's marketing campaign is centered around dodge ball, Glee once again, misses the mark. Puns are so fun!

The truly sad thing about this whole situation is that like a victim of domestic violence, I will probably continue to come back every Tuesday night, dinner will be cold, and I will die a little bit inside.

But speaking of housewives, the ladies of Wisteria Lane are back for a final season of over-the-top story lines, beyond the grave narration, and the best endorsements for Botox of EVER.

So far, I'm pleased. The secret is compelling enough, the women look better than ever (again, thank you, Botox), and with a planned final season, hopefully the writers thoughtfully tie up story lines and give a fitting end to Sunday night's biggest guilty pleasure.

My only qualm is Vanessa Williams. Like, other than Ugly Betty's cancellation, why are you here?! You're basically a Black Edie, and they killed her years ago.

Smart move for Dana Delaney leaving the lane and is now absolutely destroying it on ABC's Body Of Proof. This is quickly turning into my favorite show of ever because,

1) Delaney is a ridiculously subtle and powerful actress, and

2) Nerd Alert! I've had a lady crush on Jeri Ryan ever since she played Seven of Nine on Star Trek: Voyager. 

Anyway... Modern Family continues to be the gold standard of scripted comedy. 

30 Rock won't be back until 2012 because of Tina Fey's pregnancy. This only validates my belief that children ruin just about everything. 

And in the category of newcomers...

The overly hyped return of Simon and Paula in the form of the train wreck that has been two episodes of The X Factor literally made me want to Syliva Plath myself. Had there not been a cake in the oven, I probably would have. I anxiously awaited for a singer to blow me away or at the very least, for Paula to do something crazy, like mix up her uppers and downers and dance with MC Skat Cat 'Opposites Attract' style. 

Sadly, neither of these things happened.

ABC's Revenge is promising enough. Even though, I feel this would have been a more successful story line as a mini-series than a full blown series...

Finally, ABC's Charlie's Angels reboot has all the makings of a great cancelled series. Poor acting, heavy and expensive production, and poor casting choices. However, just like the two movies that were ridiculously terrible and near and dear to my heart, I will watch it with a bowl of popcorn and fish bowl full of boxed wine.

I promise I'll blog about something more interesting next week...